60 Not Out! | Baldock Bard

I am 60 today. Apparently, according to some junior reporter for a national newspaper who has just eschewed nappies for ‘Y’ Fronts and has column inches to fill, this is the new 40. If it is, and I very much doubt it, why does my back hurt whenever I sweep a bin, crawl under a machine or spend more than an hour in a tractor seat?

I am 60,
Fuuuuuck!
Where did the years go?
Was it really that long ago,
That I was at school,
at college,
at my wedding,
at two births?

‘Whatever happened to him?
Whatever happened to her?’
phrases I seem to have
seldom used
as for some strange reason
friends have remained
and few have strayed.

So the answer to life
is to collect friends
in the same way
you’d collect
diamonds
precious
stones
or rare
plants,
keeping them
in a very safe place
well nourished
and watered!

Thank you friends
for being…
…friends!

P.s the answer to a long and happy marriage is obvious – Do like I did and marry your best friend (34 years and still Mrs Bard hangs onto this idiot!).

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E-mail: baldockbard@www.baldockbard.co.uk

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